 Overcoming Sugar Addiction |
 
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Are you someone who can’t stop eating sugar, once you start? Are you plagued with constant food cravings, especially for sweets or refined carbohydrates, such as pasta, bread or potato chips?
Oh, how I understand! I was a compulsive sugar addict for thirty years, and found freedom. You can read my book about how I healed my sugar addiction. Or you can dive into the tools that teach you how to do it yourself in my follow up workbook and CDs, Becoming Binge Free. Not sure about all that yet? Read on for a beginner’s ten steps:
Here are ten steps to break your sugar addiction:
1. Add self care. Before you attempt to eliminate anything from your life – even something negative, such as food addiction – it’s important to add to your life, so that you are operating from an overflow, not a deficit. Eliminating sugar will create a vacuum; better to fill it with something positive – self-care – than something negative – self-sabotage. Have a good book to read, to fill the hours you might have spent eating ice cream in front of the TV; take on a hobby instead of baking.
2. Keep your blood sugar stable. Eat breakfast, eat protein with every meal or snack, eat low GI foods, and eat at regular intervals. Why? All of these things will stabilize your blood sugar, so that your moods and energy are at an even keel. Much of the time, I craved sugar because I was hungry (I was always trying to limit my eating because I was always trying to lose weight). Eat enough so that you feel satisfied, and regularly enough so that you feel stable, and you won’t crave so much junk. Learn more about what and how to eat from the sugar addiction reading list.
3. Treat yourself like you’re in detox. The first week of sugar abstinence is hard, when the cravings are at their most powerful. Be kind to yourself: this is not the time to tackle a large project, to implement lots of changes, or to work overtime. Why do people go to a spa when they’re detoxing? Because they need extra support. Likewise, give yourself extra support. Go to bed earlier. Take naps. Cook simple meals (and don’t make the same mistake I did: don’t cook meals for your family that have ingredients in them that you are trying not to eat. Don’t make sugar abstinence any harder than it needs to be.) Spend time in prayer and meditation. Call on others for support and encouragement.
4. Don’t focus on weight loss. While weight loss is usually a natural consequence of giving up sugar, don’t make it your focus. It’s better to channel your energy towards one goal at a time. So put aside your weight loss goals for now and focus on getting sugar free. Then, when you’ve achieved sugar abstinence, you can work on losing the excess weight. Weight loss is the side effect of loving your body and freeing yourself from food addiction; not the focus. Furthermore, you might be delightfully surprised to see how much easier it is to lose weight when you’re not eating sugar in the first place. Of course, we all have to eat. Check this list of sugar free snack ideas.
5. Know your true value. While yes, your body may be sugar sensitive, and while, yes, you may gorge on sugar, it’s not “you.” It’s just a coping mechanism: how you learned to care for yourself when life felt overwhelming or scary, probably when you were very small. It’s not your fault. It’s not proof that you’re a terrible person. It just is.
As you heal the core wounds that lead you to sugar, you recover these hurt parts of you. You care for them. And as you care, you’re able to stop the sugar bingeing; to care for yourself in ways that don’t cause as much suffering.
6. Create a supportive environment. For the first month after I gave up sugar, I asked my family to hide the few sweet foods we had in the house so that I wouldn’t seek them out and eat them. I avoided certain aisles in the grocery store, movie theaters, and abstained from any baking. Later on, when I was in the habit of not eating sugar, and no longer physically craving it, I was able to be around sugar without succumbing to temptation. Yes, this can be especially tricky to avoid sugar when around family during the holidays. In the beginning of your journey, give yourself the structure you need so you feel supported.
7. Be a detective. Give yourself time to experiment. Use your body as a guinea pig: what foods make you feel good? What foods make you feel bad? How did I learn that dried fruit affects me in the same way that refined sugar does? By observing my body after I ate it. How did I learn that eating tortilla chips makes me crave sugar? By observing my body. How did I learn that legumes, lean meats, and nuts satisfy my hunger and give me stable moods? By observing my body.
8. Reconsider fake sugars. I know this is a tough one to follow: many women rely on Diet sodas when they’re craving something sweet. But in my experience, aspartame, Nutrasweet, Splenda, and even low carb sugar products (protein bars that are “low sugar”) don’t quell sugar cravings, but increase them. A study at the University of Texas Health Science Center in San Antonio found that a person’s risk for obesity went up a whopping 41% for each daily can of Diet soda. See this list of hidden sources of sugar for more information.
9. Start over whenever you slip and fall. You don’t have to wait until the next morning, or succumb to the thinking that says, “I’ve blown it; I might as well have some brownies to go with it,” when you slip up and eat sugar. Giving up sugar is hard. It’s ingrained in our holidays, in our meals, in our society. Be kind to yourself when you mess up, and get right back on track. Create a positive affirmation to use: “I am resilient,” or “I am starting over,” when you make a mistake. Have some protein, make a cup of mint tea, and brush your teeth. Then remove yourself from your food source: take a walk, call a friend, go outside, go to the library. Do something to change your environment so you can switch gears. Be mindful that there are 3 stages to healing a sugar addiction. What stage are you in?
10. Forgive yourself. I felt terrible shame about my sugar addiction. Releasing that shame was like lifting an enormous weight off my psyche. We’re all imperfect. We all cope with life in messy ways. If you have food issues, offer yourself compassion. Find self-acceptance. All those times you gorged on sugar? Recognize that you were doing the best you could.
Sugar addiction is not a character defect. It’s often due to biology, imprinting, long ingrained habits, our environment and a whole host of other factors – many of which are not in our control. Can you find forgiveness for yourself? Can you see that it’s not your fault? That it may not be something you could’ve prevented?
When we release the blame – and most of us blame ourselves, and terribly so – we find we can also release the sugar. It creates a spaciousness where we can act differently, where we can respond to sugar in a different way and let go of its hold on us. Forgiveness and compassion are the only way I found peace with my sugar abstinence. It’s the only way I found that I could stay sugar free long term.
So where do you go from here?
- Learn the 4 things necessary to heal your sugar addiction.
- Read Overcoming Sugar Addiction, a book that chronicles my own story and demonstrates how you, too, can break your sugar addiction.
- Learn the tools that keep me sugar free to this day with an at home, do it yourself workbook and CDs.
A special audio message for you: If you’ve come this far, I bet you’ve got a few more questions. Listen to my explanation of how you can retake control beyond the initial detox period, find support along the way, honor your sensitivity to sugar, and make this day the start of a new way of living:
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (2.9MB)
I am at my wits end. A few years ago I read Potatoes Not Prozac and loved it, but I didn’t get far with it. About 15 years ago I gave up sugar, counted calories and lost 120lbs of which I have gained back 60. I know that my struggle is sugar… because I can’t stop thinking about it and go to great lenghts to get it even when it’s not in my house. Now that I’m older, I’m feeling the effects a lot more in the form of hypoglycemia and pre-diabetes. I am a nutritionist… so the excess weight and the sugar is an embrassing problem on many levels. I know better… but here’s the real kicker… I don’t want to give up sugar even though I know it makes me feel like crap and I know the long term dangers of it… I just enjoy it so much. I sometimes wonder if I can get as much pleasure from anything else ever again. I feel like it’s the only thing I truly really and fully enjoy in life. AND I’m not a generally depressed person. I actually have two great kids and a husband that I truly love and respect. So… how can I give up sugar with such strong feelings about it? I want to give it up, but I’m afraid I can’t because I so look forward to it…
Dearest Kate and Yvette,
I could relate to your pain and frustration, and I’m sure everyone here can, too.
Thank you for sharing your story and for your honesty. You are not alone.
One of the biggest challenges for me with sugar has been that intellectually, I know better – I know what eating sugar does to me and how it causes suffering, leading to addiction. And yet when I’m feeling caught by sugar (or other addictive foods), my intellectual brain is not in charge. My anxious, fearful, emotional brain is.
How do I soothe that part of me so that I can use my reason, my deeper will, and tap into my intentions instead of getting waylaid? That is the deeper work that I’ve been doing these past 6 years.
I am grateful for your honesty and sincerity. I also honor your courage. I hear a willingness, desire and sincerity to heal in you. I know you’ll find your way. I wish you peace, freedom and healing on your journey.
We offer more resources at http://www.sugaraddictionbook.com for you to help find this emotional freedom from sugar.
Much love, Karly
I haven’t started any program yet, but I already feel defeated. I understand that I use food, specifically sugar, as an emotional support. However, I can’t see any way to cut it out without such a level of misery and depression that I would ultimately fail. I am a trained pastry chef and have a job that I totally love, one where I get to make all sorts of goodies every day. The variety means that I never get tired of tasting what I have made. The enthusiasm that others show for my desserts is also a reward. I LOVE tasty food, far far far more than sex! I love the colors, the smells, the textures, and certainly the taste. My emotional stability in my marriage is being held up by the close availability of chocolate. I am so far in debt that I have no hope of being able to buy or do anything for pleasure for at least the next 5 years. Basically, my job, my children, and food are the only pleasures in my life. I also have no will power. Other attempts to give up sweets have made me instantly depressed, before even starting, and I end up sleeping as much as possible to hide from the fact that my conscious life sucks if I remove sugar from the picture. I end up not eating, because forcing myself to eat what I don’t desire pisses me off so much. I don’t open the carton of icecream and eat until I feel sick; I have a steady trickle throughout the entire day. Coffee and a few M&Ms for breakfast, a donut when I get to work, an apple with caramel dip as a snack, several spoons of batter of whatever dessert I am making at work, a muffin later in the day, tea and whatever leftovers I can find from the previous day’s dessert, a few more dessert bites when I serve it at dinner time, chocolate milk and a few more chocolate bites when I get home and before I go to bed. When real food is put in front of me, I eat it, but then still want sweets no matter how stuffed I am. No matter how much I eat of good food, nuts, veggies, protein, etc., I never lose the craving for something sweet. My husband wants to hear about my fantasies and I really can’t tell him, because a slice of flourless chocolate torte and a creamy cup of coffee isn’t what he has in mind. He harasses me about my sugar consumption, but isn’t supportive in a helpful or sensitive way, which ultimately makes me want to just sneak sugar to feel content without the attacks. I feel totally hopeless in this. Even thinking about it makes me depressed and I certainly can’t afford therapy or real Prozac. What do you do when a pan of warm brownies sounds so much more appealing than socializing, sex, conversations, any hobby, ready, watching tv, or any other thing I can possibly think of??? My job brings me great happiness, but puts me in contact with sugar constantly. Am I basically doomed?
Hello, I have just begun to lose the sugar and although I am not sure I am addicted as an alcoholic is addicted to alcohol, I am experiencing cravings that are beyond anything I have ever experienced. It seems that sugar is everywhere and all I can think of is cheating. Thanks for listening.
I’m so encouraged to locate this website today. The one area of my life that so grieves me is this craving for sugar, particularly ice cream. It’s like something comes over me and I go and eat it until very uncomfortable without thinking. I then ask the Lord to forgive me and do it again later. Years ago I did read the Prozac to pototoes book and it helped me see how truly physical this deal is. But, oh, I do need help. I simply cannot do this alone. And now I am approx 100 overweight….something I never thought I was capable of. I feel hopeless that I’ll succeed because I’ve failed so many times in the past. How can I get myself mentally energized again and grasp onto some real hope that I can be free and also my normal size again? Thanks.
Hi Diana,
I feel your pain. I know how helpless I’ve felt with sugar – I can empathize with your overwhelm about, “How can I heal this?” Healing my sugar addiction (and the binge eating) has been one of my greatest challenges in this life.
In October I’ll be teaching a 6 week teleclass to help men and women break free from sugar. I’d love to have you join us. The course includes weekly audio teachings, homework, and a spiral bound workbook of the 6 tools that help me maintain my sugar abstinence. Plus each week we’ll have group coaching calls where you can ask questions, share what you’re learning, and get support.
If you’re on our mailing list, you’ll hear more about the class.
In closing, if I can say anything it would be that you can heal. You’re not hopeless, or helpless. You’re not a worthless slug with no will power. You are a tender, precious (and probably sensitive!) human being who just needs some support to break free.
Best, Karly
Diana, I’m glad i found this web site too! Thanks Karly! I want to encourage you to join startyourdiet.com it’s free & it’s an online support group of women just like us- struggling to loose weight! they have tools that help us along the way to stay motivated- did i mention it’s free? good luck to you!
Thanks for the advice!
I am battling my sugar addiction in the form of COLA. I’ve tried diet and Coke Zero, but I know that I’m just going to have to give it all up.
I’ve been struggling with binge eating disorder and have a very bad sugar addiction. I am printing this article out!
I have a question though, how long does one abstain from sugar for? When is it and is it ever okay to reintroduce sugar to ones system?
Thanks!
The only thing that has ever worked for me is the 12 Step program Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous, foodaddicts.org
I have been fighting my flour and sugar addiction for over 20 years. I have been in and out this Program, and come back because trying to do Karly’s program on my own never works….I have no self control.
Hi Sara,
I’m glad you wrote, and I’m glad that you recognize that you need more structure, what FA gives you. It sounds like you’re listening to your own inner voice about what you need.
My program isn’t for everyone, and there are many different approaches to healing from sugar addiction. FA is a valid path for many people. If it works for you, keep at it!
Best to you,
Karly
Hi,
This site is just what I have been searching for! Thank you, Karly. I didn’t know that other people have issues like this as well as me. It’s great that I can finally have some support!
I have a question. Whenever I tell people that I’m giving up chocolate or unhealthy foods, they always protest or tell me to stop being stupid. For those who have given up sugar completely, what do you say to people when they ask why you’re so picky with food?! I find it really discouraging when people have a go because I’m trying to be healthy (and not broadcast to the world that I have an addiction to sugar!).
Thanks,
Miriam
Hi Miriam,
You are so welcome. Isn’t it great to know you’re not the only one who feels this way, to know you’re not alone and – more importantly – not crazy? That your problems with sugar aren’t in your head or a willpower issue?
Have you read Potatoes Not Prozac by Kathleen des Maisons? That’s the first place I would start to learn about “sugar sensitivity” and why sugar effects your body differently than other people’s.
In my book, Overcoming Sugar Addiction, I talk about the issue you explore here – how do you stand up for yourself when everyone around you eats differently or doesn’t support your choices?
I don’t broadcast how I eat. If people are really insistent on pushing sugar on me, I keep saying, “No thank you.” Eventually they stop!
At one point, though, I *did* broadcast how I ate and had a huge monologue handy about how I didn’t eat sugar. It caused lots of problems. People would feel judged and would get defensive – and then they would attack me and my choices. Then I would feel judged and defensive! My need to explain myself created feelings of judgment, separation and isolation. I would get angry and feel unloved and also feel unsupported in my challenges with food.
Today, I just say no thank you. If someone asks out of curiousity, I’ll share with them. But my sugar abstinence is not something I feel a need to defend or a need to get others to join “in the cause.”
Often, we tell others about our desire to give up sugar for 2 reasons: 1. to get support and 2. to get validation.
Get support. Support is vital. But don’t confuse it with validation – a pat on the back from others. When we want validation, that’s when we an come across as attacking others’ eating choices or as trying to “one up” them.
Does this make sense? Is the difference clear?
XO, Karly
sugar is a drug. someone, ANYONE, convince me otherwise. even when i don’t like the way something with sugar in it tastes, or even when i know i’ve had enough, sometimes, OFTEN, i just “can’t” stop. and just like an addict to other powerful drugs to which the body becomes resistant, many times i consume the sugary products to bring me from feeling horrible to feeling normal enough to function.
!?!?!
Hi Atiyah,
I’m the same way. I would look up what Kathleen des Maisons, the pioneer in sugar addiction research and author of Potatoes not Prozac, has to say about this. She does a great job of explaining why those of us who are “sugar sensitive” – a term she coined – can’t stop eating sugar once we start. It has to do with the brain, not willpower or a character flaw.
Learn more here: http://www.radiantrecovery.com/newsensitive1.htm
When I understood that my sugar sensitivity is something real and has to do with my brain – not a deep seated character flaw – I was able to take the steps to stop eating sugar – not out of punishment, but as an act of love and care for myself. My book Overcoming Sugar Addiction (
http://www.firstourselves.com/sugar-support/sugar-addiction-book/) explains this in further detail.
XO, Karly
I have given up sugar as well (8 weeks this Thursday), and am wondering how you implement “no sugar” in your life. I went sugar free at first just to lose weight on this diet as recommended by Dr Mercola’s book “No Grain Diet.” I have given up all grains, starchy food, and fruits (except for some lemon juice added to teas and sauces). On the stabilize portion of this (diet for life) I can have healthy grains quinoa, spelt, and tef etc. I have only cheated on my diet once (last Monday) by getting a sundae (totally wasn’t worth it!) and I had a headache afterwards.
On the stabilize portion of this diet I can have fruit and the grains in more limited quantities. Mostly watching and monitoring my body weight and glucose levels closely to make sure the grains aren’t making me gain or I’m not eating too much glucose.
I’m just wondering what it feels like to be sugar free longer. Also, besides staying away from sugar explicitly, do you also avoid artificial sweeteners, honey, starches, and monitor your fruit intake?
On the stabilize portion of this eating plan, I can have xylitol and raw organic honey desserts, but I’m not sure how often I should eat these things. They’re labeled as “treats.”
How often would you suggest I eat healthier treats like this?
Also, the hardest thing about this diet is avoiding all the added sugars in food. Such as sugars that are just in my sauce on my steak dianne. Do you avoid all added/hidden sugars when you go out to eat, or do you go ahead and eat them, but refrain from things more obvious with their sugar content?
The hardest part is finding dishes that don’t have any sugar content at all. Almost impossible unless I just eat raw fish, chicken breast, or plan salad with o/v on side!
Hi Emily,
My book Overcoming Sugar Addiction answers many of your questions. It shares my experience of giving up sugar and making peace with sugar free living – as well as how to find the joy of eating this way (healing my feelings of deprivation and “it’s not fair.”)
Yes, not eating added sugars is an adjustment! I look at sugar in the same way someone may look at a food they’re allergic to. In this free friends area of First Ourselves, there’s a 30 minute audio where I talk about this. Go here to join (it’s free): http://www.firstourselves.com/membership/
XO, Karly
Any Idea the effect it would have on a 14 year old girl?I was never really into sugar. I mean I really don’t eat sugary things, or really salty things. But I know i do consume some like in cereal. BUt not enough to really hurt me. You should see some kids, they eat so much.I’m really good for my age, and I don’t eat fast-food or dairy. Do you think I should try?
Kyler,
My husband is someone like you – he eats some sugar but it doesn’t cause a problem for him. He can have a bowl of ice cream and stop.
When I eat ice cream, I eat it until I’m sick.
What’s the difference? I’m sugar sensitive. My husband is not. That’s why I don’t eat sugar, but my husband eats it in moderation.
From your description, it sounds like you’re okay eating sugar and that you do your best to eat a healthy diet. Good for you. I love the adage, “If it’s not broke, don’t fix it!” It sounds like you’re right where you need to be.
To your health and wholeness, Karly
great post as usual!
Hi Karly,
I really don’t know where to start. I can’t imagine a life without sugar yet I know that is an illusion. I am living off caffeine and sugar and fat and going to school. Not really nutritional for my brain. I stopped bulimia about 1.5yrs ago which is amazing. Any idea where I can start.
Melinda
Hi Melinda,
There are lots of free resources here to help you. We have a free friends area with audio and exercises and more: http://www.firstourselves.com/membership/
If you are thinking that you’d like to start giving up sugar, you may want to read Potatoes not Prozac by Kathleen des Maisons. It’s the book that taught me about sugar and helped me break free. I’d also suggest reading my book, Overcoming Sugar Addiction, that shares my story and how I gave up sugar.
You may also be interested in reading Julia Ross’ book The Mood Cure. Many of us who’ve had bulimia have found this book helpful in healing the brain.
That’s where I would start.
You can heal this!
XO, Karly
I’m getting ready to join a support group/motivational program here locally run by Dr. Nick Yphantides called healthsteward. I have recognized that sugar addiction is the major issue for me as far as being the food I turn to for emotional suppport. The thing about the tortilla chips is very interesting also because I tend to like to binge eat chips and salsa and then I want to eat sugar. I also notice I seem to crave cheese a lot. Do you see any connection between that and the sugar addiction. I started a medication three months ago which I was on 10 years ago. During that time previously I gained 80 lbs and I am only 5’2″. My appetite is increasing and so are my cravings and I am exercising but I’m not interested in over-exercising to keep up with eating too much sugar or anythingelse. I want to stop this now. In two weeks I start healthstewards and will be part of a small accountability group which meets once a week for 45 minutes preceded by a 45 minute motivational lecture given by Dr. Yphantides. I plan to read your book right alongside with his (“My Big Fat Greek Diet”). God bless and thank you.
Yeah for you Sharon!! It sounds like you are connecting the dots and putting together the pieces for your health.
XO, Karly
I am a sugar addict. I tried giving up sugar for lent–failed. I changed it to chocolate—-failed. I wish my health insurance would cover a treatment program (like they do for other addictions (etoh, drugs). I really think I need inpatient treatment with multiple disciplines involved in the process. I googled “sugar addiction” and came across this site. I sure hope there is something here that will help!
Hi Elaine,
I can relate to your story. My sugar addiction felt so huge – it felt impossible to heal. But I want to assure you that you can. The First Ourselves sugar addiction support program uses many disciplines, and may be just what you need. We’d love to have you join the hundreds of other women who are giving up sugar together:
http://www.firstourselves.com/sugar-support/
While I enjoyed reading the ebook, I noticed that there weren’t a lot of options for vegans. I do not eat meat or animal byproducts. Not only do I do this for my health, I also do it because I care about the rights and welfare of all animals. My main foods involve lots of fresh fruits and vegetables, and I abstain from eating any animal flesh or other body parts. I also avoid processed, packaged foods. This diet works very well for me. I stay trim, healthy, and full of energy, and it feels wonderful that my actions reflect my values. Veganism is a great way to avoid unnecessary added sugars and reap the benefits of natural foods without the guilt of consuming the flesh of living beings.
Hi Meg,
I know many vegans who also choose not to eat sugar. I think that’s great that you’re aligning your values with your food choices, and finding a way of eating that resonates with you body, mind and spirit. My philosophy about food is that each person needs to find a way of eating that honors their body – an integrative approach that values many different ways of eating. In my ebook, I share what works for me as an example of one way of sugar free eating, and not as a prescription for what to follow.
And here’s what we do have in common – vegetables and nuts are the mainstays of my diet. We consume *a lot* of produce in our house.
Thank you very much for this ebook! I have recently come to terms with the fact that I am addicted to sugar, and did not have any idea how to overcome this addiction. This has been very helpful, and I feel that planning how I am going to overcome it is halfway to actually doing it
Hi Joanna,
You’re welcome! I’m glad that the book has been helpful to you. If I can do this, you can, too – and I was the biggest sugar junkie I knew. If you need more support, considering joining our forums or our sugar program:
http://www.firstourselves.com/sugar-support/
Support is the biggest key, I think, to change. Lack of support was one reason why it took me so long to get off sugar for good.
I’m excited for you as you take this leap forward.
I love your e-Book. But the link to other books about the negative effects of sugar is dead:
http://www.firstourselves.com/first_ourselves/sugarbooklist.html
Thanks!
Hi Clay,
I’m sorry about the broken link. We relaunched our site in the past 6 months on a new hosting platform, which has resulted in broken links. Try this link to get to the reading list:
http://www.firstourselves.com/2008/reading-list-for-sugar-addiction/
Thank you sooo much for providing this book for free out of the kindness of your heart!! I have just come to terms with my addiction. I have known it for years but have been reluctant to give up my addiction because I have never had any support and because it is so accepted in our society like you said. It’s flipping everywhere!!! Thank you soo much for taking the time to help people like me with their addictions and providing a comforting helping hand through our struggles.
You are very welcome, Brittany. Yes, you are right – it’s hard to give up something that is so ingrained in our lives. And yet the freedom on the other side is so powerful. I know you can do this – keep the faith.
V interesting ebook. Thanks for all the info. So much hidden sugar everywhere!
Flaneur, Yes, there’s lots of hidden sugar, particularly in prepared and packaged food. I can taste the sugar pretty easily – just the other day I was eating a new salsa my husband bought. As soon as I’d had a taste, I said, “This has sugar in it.”
“No it doesn’t,” my husband replied.
I read the label, and sure enough – sugar.
You may want to read The End of Overeating by David Kessler, as he talks about how the food processing industry intentionally adds sugar (and salt) to food to make it taste better and to sell more. Very interesting read….