Guest author Mary K. is a 58-year-old resident of Minnesota, and has read every book published on sugar addiction.
I have gone through the grieving process with the sudden death of my husband at age 50 and I see how we must go through a similar process in order to gain Acceptance of our sugar addictions.
Denial: I denied for years that I had a sugar addiction. How could I have a sugar addiction?
The media talked about drug, alcohol, gambling, and shopping addictions, but I never saw anything about sugar addiction. I tried for years eating sugar in moderation — didn’t work — just sent me into full blown binges. I really didn’t realize how dramatically it had impacted my life and my relationships until I’d reached a point where I’d had several periods of sugar abstinence and observed how my personality (emotionally, spiritually and physically) changed when not eating sugar.
Anger: All of my anger was directed at myself. “Why can’t you get your act together and stop overeating? Why can’t you lose weight? You are weak and have no willpower.”
Depression: It was depressing when I realized I cannot eat like other people, but there are individuals who can’t walk like other people, who can’t see like other people, who can’t drink like other people. I’m not unique. I just have a physiology that does not work well when I eat sugar.
Acceptance: I have reached acceptance. Doesn’t mean it’s still not a struggle. But I accept that in order to take care of myself, just the way I am, I need to do whatever it takes to avoid sugar.
I accept that eating sugar brings with it depression, foggy thinking, headaches, anxiety, fearfulness, low self-esteem, and a huge desire to hibernate. I accept that not eating sugar returns me to a self-confident, sharp thinking, calmer woman who has a much more positive outlook on life.
Grieving my husband’s sudden death took years, as has grieving the fact that I can’t eat like other people. There is never an end to grief. We just learn how to integrate it into our lives.
Mary is the proud grandmother of three children, and looks forward to the two more on the way. She’ll tell you that young woman today are so very fortunate because there’s much more information out there now about sugar addiction, especially how to unhook emotionally from sugar.
Mary, Thank you for your honest, vulnerable post. I think you are spot on when you wrote this here: “There is never an end to grief. We just learn how to integrate it into our lives.”
You show a willingness to feel and explore your grief – which also frees you to move forward.
Much love, Karly